Redeeming reusable quotes

Some original quotes that you may use with due credits in your presentations, smart alec responses or generally to relieve stress.



First quote is provided in template that I would like to request you to use.

  • I automated the totally useless activity that we should not be even doing and saved huge money for the company.
         ~Vikram Chandna
  • NoDev, need is the mother of invention.
  • Unpredictive Analytics, 'tell me what I  don't know'
  • Artificial Intelligence- fed bank statements, credit card details, diary scans,  lipid profile, facebook timeline, blog hits analytics and recent job performance appraisal and applied K-means clustering algorithm and ARIMA model to get some guidance. It told me I should be sleeping on left side at 45 degrees angle.
  • Thanks God for creating all the species. We would be running out of names for the latest products.
  • Doc prescribed Agile for 'collective amnesia'.
  • I had to get DevOps guy. I wasn't sure what all he is supposed to do, so I asked for everything including killer communication.
  • Machine learning, as people refuse to learn.
  • Availability means, available when I want it.
  • Data mining is, discovering things you forgot.
  • Dumpster diving gets respected again, thanks unstructured data analytics
  • 'Bowls' for you. Why pay for containers and more than what you need?
  • Microservices, small is beautiful again, big is ugly.
  • Handling difficult aspiration session with techie, convert it into your aspiration session. 'I would like to see you drive $1 billion sales for me with that new tech idea. Give me a plan'
Cheers!


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